The Evolution of Marauder Man
1. The Tabula Rasa Phase
- Man discovers Marauder, marvels.
- Vocabulary consists of words such as "wow," "cool," "ooh" and "ahh."
- Frequently scratches head.
2. The Garden of Eden Phase
- Man discovers aftermarket, is tempted by vendors to mod.
- The God Mercury says, in thunderous voice from above, "Do so and ye shall not see Warranty."
- Vocabulary consists of words like "ECM," "gears" and "cams," and sentences such as, "Would a K&N increase horsepower?"
3. The Crusades
- Man is divided - the "Stockers" and the "Mods."
- Reign of Dennis the Great, King Hyland and Kenny Brown of S.
- Skirmishes break out in various Forums.
- This was the great "Three Year War" that spanned 36,000 miles.
4. The Renaissance
- Man begins doing mods for mod's sake and exhibits cognitive dissonance in matters involving performance, reliability and economy.
5. The Industrial Period
- Massive aftermarket growth and subsequent spending sends Man into the "Great Financial Depression."
- Wife Wars I and II occur.
- Wife War II brings about the end of the Depression as Man gets higher-paying job.
6. Final Phase - Modern Marauder Man
- Freely mods car, including engine internals.
- Possesses massive tool collection.
- Develops keen eye for cops.
- Frequently drag races on & off the track.
- Spends more time under car than under wife.
- Dies happy.
Eric