Retirement ceremony

[IwantmyMMnow!]

I mentioned in a post some time ago about when I'm going to have my retirement ceremony and several of you expressed interest in possibly attending. Right now, I've picked 11 Nov as the day of my ceremony (figured it would be appropriate to have it on Veteran's Day); I picked this date because I know it will probably be the best day for my family members to attend, especially my kids. Plus, my uncle Bob from Texas will be in NC visiting my Dad that weekend as well.

Just want to know if anyone is interested in attending my ceremony; it will be early afternoon (1 or 2pm). Location is TBD, but will be in the vicinity of the base (North Charleston), if not on the base.

I know it's difficult to commit this far out, but need to know by the conclusion MV9 weekend so I can mail out official invitations within the next week or two afterwards.

Thanks.

[rayjay]

I can not attend, but want to offer my thanks for your career in service to our country. :flag:

Retirement is great. I've been retired from state law enforcement for a year.

Enjoy! :beer:

[fastblackmerc]

Congrats and thanks for your service!

[GordonB]

Can't attend, but want to thank you for your service!
GordonB

[CBT]

Far out, congratulations! I broke out my khaki's and pinned a buddy of mine who made Chief, this very morning, on the U.S.S. New York. :beer:

[Marauderman]

I mentioned in a post some time ago about when I'm going to have my retirement ceremony and several of you expressed interest in possibly attending. Right now, I've picked 11 Nov as the day of my ceremony (figured it would be appropriate to have it on Veteran's Day); I picked this date because I know it will probably be the best day for my family members to attend, especially my kids. Plus, my uncle Bob from Texas will be in NC visiting my Dad that weekend as well.

Just want to know if anyone is interested in attending my ceremony; it will be early afternoon (1 or 2pm). Location is TBD, but will be in the vicinity of the base (North Charleston), if not on the base.

I know it's difficult to commit this far out, but need to know by the conclusion MV9 weekend so I can mail out official invitations within the next week or two afterwards.

Thanks.



The time of the Retirement ceremony is key ----Wife has close cousin there where we could spend the night and of course I served there for 2 years centuries ago---if the time is right we could come down --drop wife off at cousins and I could come and maybe see bit of the old --excuse me--new base for awhile........let me know--Thanks Tom

[Marauderman]

The time of the Retirement ceremony is key ----Wife has close cousin there where we could spend the night and of course I served there for 2 years centuries ago---if the time is right we could come down --drop wife off at cousins and I could come and maybe see bit of the old --excuse me--new base for awhile........let me know--Thanks Tom

Hey Man!! Time to read the post!!! Let me know so I can plan----hello??????

[IwantmyMMnow!]

it will be early afternoon (1 or 2pm). Location is TBD, but will be in the vicinity of the base (North Charleston), if not on the base.


Hey Man!! Time to read the post!!! Let me know so I can plan----hello??????

Been on the road quite a bit over the past 48 hrs...my place to Charlotte Fri night, then Charlotte to Asheville and back yesterday...

I love driving your MM!!!

[bugsyc]

As I stated in the past,on this very well deserved,(I'm guessing)special occasion,I would be honored to attend...This would be a great time to finally meet..bugsy.....retired Army CONGRATS :banana: :bows:

[Marauderman]

Been on the road quite a bit over the past 48 hrs...my place to Charlotte Fri night, then Charlotte to Asheville and back yesterday...

I love driving your MM!!!

I'm glad you like my Sliver MM--Can't seem to fine one like it anywhere----......anyway...........things are changing all the time--so when u can let me know the detrails --will see what I can do ...take care my friend---Tom

[IwantmyMMnow!]

I'm glad you like my Sliver MM--Can't seem to fine one like it anywhere----......anyway...........things are changing all the time--so when u can let me know the detrails --will see what I can do ...take care my friend---Tom

My ceremony will now be on Nov 19th (a Saturday); start time will be 2pm. Location is TBD; want to have it off-base, just haven't figured out exactly where yet.

I realized that I will still have to come to work for most of the week following the 11th, since my last official duty day will be around the 16th/17th. My speech that I plan to deliver will not be all flowers and candy; I will speak my mind on what has transpired this year, so would like to speak freely.

Once I get the location figured out, I'll post on here...

52 work days / 96 calendar days until I'm done!

[SC Cheesehead]

My ceremony will now be on Nov 19th (a Saturday); start time will be 2pm. Location is TBD; want to have it off-base, just haven't figured out exactly where yet.

I realized that I will still have to come to work for most of the week following the 11th, since my last official duty day will be around the 16th/17th. My speech that I plan to deliver will not be all flowers and candy; I will speak my mind on what has transpired this year, so would like to speak freely.

Once I get the location figured out, I'll post on here...

52 work days / 96 calendar days until I'm done!

I may be able to make this...

[Marauderman]

My ceremony will now be on Nov 19th (a Saturday); start time will be 2pm. Location is TBD; want to have it off-base, just haven't figured out exactly where yet.

I realized that I will still have to come to work for most of the week following the 11th, since my last official duty day will be around the 16th/17th. My speech that I plan to deliver will not be all flowers and candy; I will speak my mind on what has transpired this year, so would like to speak freely.

Once I get the location figured out, I'll post on here...

52 work days / 96 calendar days until I'm done!


I may be able to make this...



Me too--I am only off two weekends and that is one of them....--would love to drive down earily that morning and checkout the base and drop off Ms. M at her cousins and then on to your farewell holler:lol: --will let you know- more as it gets closer too.

[IwantmyMMnow!]

The invitations for my retirement ceremony will be printed on 28 Oct. I know it's still 3+ weeks away, but if you will be coming down to attend, I need to know by the 26th so I can have an invite mailed to you. They will be mailed by the 1st/2nd of Nov.

Just a reminder, my ceremony is on Nov 19th at 2pm...location is still TBD, but should be firmed up before the invites are printed.

[Marauderman]

The invitations for my retirement ceremony will be printed on 28 Oct. I know it's still 3+ weeks away, but if you will be coming down to attend, I need to know by the 26th so I can have an invite mailed to you. They will be mailed by the 1st/2nd of Nov.

Just a reminder, my ceremony is on Nov 19th at 2pm...location is still TBD, but should be firmed up before the invites are printed.

Still off the 5th and 19th for the month---so am still a go for now--

[IwantmyMMnow!]

If you are planning to come to my retirement ceremony, I need to have first/last name of everyone that will be there as well as your home address for mailing purposes. Need this info by 27 Oct.

Rex & Russ, I already have your home addy.

[Marauderman]

If you are planning to come to my retirement ceremony, I need to have first/last name of everyone that will be there as well as your home address for mailing purposes. Need this info by 27 Oct.

Rex & Russ, I already have your home addy.

I'll PM you mine....Nov is a busy weekend month for me--no weekend left unattended somewhere----:lol:

[bugsyc]

I'm coming....I'll PM names and address

[Blown3.8]

Congrats! Have fun! Must be nice to retire at 40.

[Marauderman]

Congrats! Have fun! Must be nice to retire at 40.

He just thinks he is retired--he hasn't seen any real civilian life like we have ----he is in for a real :surprise:for sure--that's why he needs us!!!!!!!!

[SC Cheesehead]

He just thinks he is retired--he hasn't seen any real civilian life like we have ----he is in for a real :surprise:for sure--that's why he needs us!!!!!!!!

Dr Ray Stantz (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000101/): ...You don't know what it's like out there! I've *worked* in the private sector. They expect *results*.

:D

[IwantmyMMnow!]

...due to the exercise we are having this week, my invites have been put on the back burner. They should be g-t-g by the end of next week, so if you want to attend and haven't sent my your info, send it to me by 1 Nov.

If you'd like to get an invite just for the heck of it, go ahead and send me your info and I'll send one to you.

Reminder:

Retirement ceremony is 19 Nov at 2pm (1400); place is still TBD...should have it named by end of next week.

[SC Cheesehead]

...due to the exercise we are having this week, my invites have been put on the back burner. They should be g-t-g by the end of next week, so if you want to attend and haven't sent my your info, send it to me by 1 Nov.

If you'd like to get an invite just for the heck of it, go ahead and send me your info and I'll send one to you.

Reminder:

Retirement ceremony is 19 Nov at 2pm (1400); place is still TBD...should have it named by end of next week.


PM sent.
-------------

[IwantmyMMnow!]

Ceremony 19 Nov at 2pm...

I've decided to have my ceremony on base after all. It will be in the 14th Airlift Squadron's auditorium...their building is right next to the building I work in. I will create a detailed map to show how to get there once on base; I will post this map here by next weekend.

Anyone attending that does not posess a military ID will have to enter via the Dorchester Rd gate; this is where the visitor's center is located. I will provide the front gate with a list of names so you can get a pass. I suggest you arrive at the visitors center no later than 130pm...it will probably take 5-10 minutes to get your pass, then 5 minutes to get to the building where the ceremony is being held.

Best way to get to the Dorchester Rd gate is to follow 1-26 to I-526 (Savannah); ignore the Charleston AFB/Aviation Rd exit, which is 3 exits before you hit I-526. Then follow I-526 to International Blvd exit, then make a left onto Michaux Parkway, then a right onto Dorchester Rd. You can use your GPS or other means to map this out.

The ceremony will last about 45 minutes, and there will be refreshments afterwards. I am also open to having dinner with all that come down (or up), if interested.

Any questions, post here or PM me....

[bugsyc]

Congrats,I'm sure you've earned it....Now you want to get a hobby.After the first few monthys of lounging around you'll get as bored as ,well a soldier without a gun,I know I did.....Lots of time to work on the Marauder....Best wishes....See you on the 19thy.bugsy....:cool:

[IwantmyMMnow!]

I won't be 'lounging' around too much; will be going to school full-time and working part-time. I'll be only 30 minutes from my kids, which is the most important thing...will have to wait until spring/warmer temps to work on my MM. Hope to be able to do quite a bit on her in December before I move. I'll be on 'terminal leave' (aka paid vacation), so will have more time during that month than I do now and after I move.

[IwantmyMMnow!]

Just found out earlier today that the mailing of invitations is limited to immediate family. All others will receive an electronic invitation (or 'e-invitation').

Sorry for making you all send me your address info, because now I need your email address info to send you an invite. Don't worry about RSVPing or contacting anyone; I will make note of who I send e-invites to and pass that on to the POC for my ceremony.

Another thing to add to the getting on base aspect. You will need to have a valid DL and registration to get a pass.

[IwantmyMMnow!]

Attached is map of how to get from visitor's center to the 14th Airlift Squadron (bldg 72). The auditorium is on the 2nd floor.

[IwantmyMMnow!]

mmmm no attach...

[IwantmyMMnow!]

There we go...

[IwantmyMMnow!]

If you are coming to my ceremony, I need a yea/nay by Monday night. I have to turn in my list of 'guests' to the visitors' center on Tuesday. I also need your email address so I can send you an electronic invitation. Please PM me this info. If you won't know for certain if you will/will not make it until a day or two before, go ahead and send me your info...rather have you g-t-g and not make it versus the other way around.

Thanks...

[03mmmonroe]

If you are coming to my ceremony, I need a yea/nay by Monday night. I have to turn in my list of 'guests' to the visitors' center on Tuesday. I also need your email address so I can send you an electronic invitation. Please PM me this info. If you won't know for certain if you will/will not make it until a day or two before, go ahead and send me your info...rather have you g-t-g and not make it versus the other way around.

Thanks...

you have a pm.

Russ

[Marauderman]

Sorry Kyle--Unable to make it on the 19th--will be in Greenville,SC area that day---Congrats on your special day--we will get together again_

[IwantmyMMnow!]

All,

I've had to reschedule my ceremony date...it is now Dec 10th, 2pm.

Without getting into all the politics, I was presented with two choices: still have it this Saturday and HOPE everything turns out okay, or reschedule.

The person I asked to handle my ceremony has basically 'dropped the ball' and dumped it on someone else's lap.

Yes, I'm very :censor: about what I was told earlier today, but it's more important that my ceremony be a proper one; one that I deserve.

For those of you that expressed interest in attending my ceremony, but couldn't this Saturday, please let me know if you'll be able to attend now that the ceremony is on Dec 10th.

Russ, bugsyc: If rescheduling my ceremony keeps you from attending, I am very, very sorry. Hope you guys can still make it...

[Bluerauder]

The person I asked to handle my ceremony has basically 'dropped the ball' and dumped it on someone else's lap.

Sorry to hear about the delay in your retirement ceremony/party. Maybe you can "return" the favor one day for the azzhat who dropped the ball. :P

Seems that this ^^^^^ kind of :bs: happens more and more frequently as time goes on. Many people are just looking to do as little as possible or pass off the real work to someone else. Incompetence abounds in virtually every field of endeavor and you can no longer take a person's word for anything. When you find that one or few persons that you can trust to get things done, you go back to them over and over again. And the dirtbags who avoid everything can go to schools and training and build their resume. I am always a little skeptical when I see a massive laundry list of training on a resume. To me that indicates that the person is "expendable" within the office and NO ONE cares if they are there or not ... the results are the same.

Good Luck on your Retirement and I hope this all works out for the better. :up:

[03mmmonroe]

All,

I've had to reschedule my ceremony date...it is now Dec 10th, 2pm.

Without getting into all the politics, I was presented with two choices: still have it this Saturday and HOPE everything turns out okay, or reschedule.

The person I asked to handle my ceremony has basically 'dropped the ball' and dumped it on someone else's lap.

Yes, I'm very :censor: about what I was told earlier today, but it's more important that my ceremony be a proper one; one that I deserve.

For those of you that expressed interest in attending my ceremony, but couldn't this Saturday, please let me know if you'll be able to attend now that the ceremony is on Dec 10th.

Russ, bugsyc: If rescheduling my ceremony keeps you from attending, I am very, very sorry. Hope you guys can still make it...

I still should be able to make it on the 10 right now.

Russ

[CBT]

Bummer, man! Heck, I may have to re-look at the calender....

[Marauderman]

All,

I've had to reschedule my ceremony date...it is now Dec 10th, 2pm.

Without getting into all the politics, I was presented with two choices: still have it this Saturday and HOPE everything turns out okay, or reschedule.

The person I asked to handle my ceremony has basically 'dropped the ball' and dumped it on someone else's lap.

Yes, I'm very :censor: about what I was told earlier today, but it's more important that my ceremony be a proper one; one that I deserve.

For those of you that expressed interest in attending my ceremony, but couldn't this Saturday, please let me know if you'll be able to attend now that the ceremony is on Dec 10th.

Russ, bugsyc: If rescheduling my ceremony keeps you from attending, I am very, very sorry. Hope you guys can still make it...

Ah man--sorry to hear this kind of crap--like Charlie said--but I will see whats on the menu for that Saturday and let you know--

[bugsyc]

As of now,I should be able to make it.I'm looking foward to meeting some new friends....You know the saying, Hurry up and wait...Uncle Sam for ya.

[IwantmyMMnow!]

Sorry to hear about the delay in your retirement ceremony/party. Maybe you can "return" the favor one day for the azzhat who dropped the ball. :P

Seems that this ^^^^^ kind of :bs: happens more and more frequently as time goes on. Many people are just looking to do as little as possible or pass off the real work to someone else. Incompetence abounds in virtually every field of endeavor and you can no longer take a person's word for anything. When you find that one or few persons that you can trust to get things done, you go back to them over and over again...

I agree, Charlie....I've found quite a few of those 'diamonds in the rough' ever since I became a MM owner 8 months ago....more than I've been able to find over the past 20 years....

Well, I need to s***, shower, and shave and put on my ABUs for the last time...got my final out-processing appointment this afternoon. Then it's the old blues/service dress for the last time on the 10th.

[CBT]

I agree, Charlie....I've found quite a few of those 'diamonds in the rough' ever since I became a MM owner 8 months ago....more than I've been able to find over the past 20 years....

Well, I need to s***, shower, and shave and put on my ABUs for the last time...got my final out-processing appointment this afternoon. Then it's the old blues/service dress for the last time on the 10th.


It's fun on the outside! :beer: :flag:

[IwantmyMMnow!]

As of 3:33pm today, I am 'officially outprocessed'. I'm now on 'vacation' for 6+ weeks (20 days permissive TDY then 25 days of terminal leave) until I'm actually retired. Think I may go to the bar and do a little celebrating later...:beer:

[Marauderman]

As of 3:33pm today, I am 'officially outprocessed'. I'm now on 'vacation' for 6+ weeks (20 days permissive TDY then 25 days of terminal leave) until I'm actually retired. Think I may go to the bar and do a little celebrating later...:beer:

Can't you turn back in that time for $$$$$ vs taking it off?

[slickster]

Congrats man and thank you. I'll let you know if I can make it

[IwantmyMMnow!]

Can't you turn back in that time for $$$$$ vs taking it off?

Yes, I could, but why? I get paid the same whether I'm on leave or not. Plus, we are having our big once-every-three-years inspection in two weeks. I have no interest in playing war games, sucking rubber, and eating MREs...all while making sure I have my reflective belt on for safety, mind you. Besides, the $$$ I would get isn't enough to make me want to do that anyway.

[Marauderman]

Yes, I could, but why? I get paid the same whether I'm on leave or not. Plus, we are having our big once-every-three-years inspection in two weeks. I have no interest in playing war games, sucking rubber, and eating MREs...all while making sure I have my reflective belt on for safety, mind you. Besides, the $$$ I would get isn't enough to make me want to do that anyway.

I understand!! Now calm down---it will be all right soon..and then it becomes a bad dream!! Yahoo!!!!!!!!

[IwantmyMMnow!]

I understand!! Now calm down---it will be all right soon..and then it becomes a bad dream!! Yahoo!!!!!!!!

CALM DOWN?!?!?!? WHY ARE YOU TELLING ME TO CALM DOWN?!?!? :lol:

I'm just glad that it is finally a done deal (with the exception of my ret ceremony); I will consider 2011 the 'year of being in limbo'. First my marriage, then making a decision on retiring.

I'm very happy that I pulled the trigger on buying my MM...gave me a reason to be happy in what has been a tough year for me, and also gave me something to look forward to in regards to posting on this site and meeting other MM owners.

I'm ready for 2012...and the hell with all those 'prognosticators' saying the world is going to end!!!

[IwantmyMMnow!]

So, I'm getting the feeling that my retirement ceremony is getting in the way of everyone elses lives here on base...was asked Tuesday to consider changing my ceremony date AGAIN! I said no, but asked if changing the time would help, and was told yes.

My ceremony is still going to happen on the 10th, but it is now going to be at 3pm instead of 2pm. I also found out this morning I can't turn in a guest list to allow non-military access to the base; can do this only once in a 30-day period. So, I need to find an active duty person (more than likely me)that would be willing to sit at the visitors center to sign in those of you that don't have a military ID.

IIRC, Russ is the only person attending that doesn't have military ID. If this isn't correct, please speak up. Those that don't have military ID, I can meet you at the visitor's center between 2-230 to sign you in.

I sent my former flight commander an email yesterday expressing my disappointment in regards to how my ceremony has been/is being handled. I have gone from looking forward with great anticipation to this day to just wanting to get it over with. :shake:

My retirement wasn't a 'secret'...it was finalized on paper back in July. No one here expressed any interest in my desires for my ceremony...I had to get the ball rolling in early October, only to have it 'dropped' 4 days before my original date. I am very upset about this and find it disrespectful.

I also found out that according to today's 'protocol', the retiree is expected to do most of the work in regards to his own ceremony....I don't agree with this at all; just another reason why I believe the AF isn't what it used to be and am glad I will no longer have to put up with the ever-rampant stupid BS nowadays.

I was the POC for a retirement about 5 years ago and the retiree wasn't asked to do anything except show up...apparently things have changed since then....

[rayjay]

My retirement wasn't a 'secret'...it was finalized on paper back in July. No one here expressed any interest in my desires for my ceremony...I had to get the ball rolling in early October, only to have it 'dropped' 4 days before my original date. I am very upset about this and find it disrespectful.

I also found out that according to today's 'protocol', the retiree is expected to do most of the work in regards to his own ceremony....I don't agree with this at all; just another reason why I believe the AF isn't what it used to be and am glad I will no longer have to put up with the ever-rampant stupid BS nowadays.

I was the POC for a retirement about 5 years ago and the retiree wasn't asked to do anything except show up...apparently things have changed since then....

I can sympathize with your situation. Myself and two of my people were going to retire last fall, spaced out, so it would not have a catostrophic impact on our agency. Then the employer announced a early reitrement incentive. All three of us took part. You would have been completely knuts not to, it added almost 3 years service credit for me. Each station could choose the latest date to retire by up to December 31st. Our administrators saw dollar signs and chose August instead of December to retire the long time Members out. Then labelled us as deserters to the remaining staff for having caused a staffing shortage. They held a ceremony at a time when few could attend, not to mention several months after we had retired. I then had to chide my supervisor into providing our retirement credentials almost a year late. These are normally given out at the intial ceremony. FWIW, he is retired Officer from the USAF... :rolleyes: Nice way to treat Members with 25, 26 and 34 years of service, and they wanted me to stay for year 35, I don't think so....

[Bluerauder]

So, I'm getting the feeling that my retirement ceremony is getting in the way of everyone elses lives here on base...

I have gone from looking forward with great anticipation to this day to just wanting to get it over with. :shake:

..apparently things have changed since then....

Your signature block says that your "official" retirement date is 1 January 2012. Are you on terminal leave until then?

There used to be a military term "FIGMO". You probably know what it means. Your office and co-workers don't seem real interested in a decent send off for you ... for whatever reason.

If I were in the same position, I think I would just "gracefully" retire on my appointed date and just fade away without the fanfare. Have something informal with your friends. All the hassle associated with this event will leave a bitter taste in your mouth for years to come. Just let it go. JMHO. Hope this works out for you.

When I retired nearly 20 years ago (May 1992), I really didn't want a fuss; but my office insisted and put together a nice gathering. As you said, I didn't have to do anything but show up with my family in tow. After the ceremony and a small party, I went over to Fort Myer, signed the final papers, waited for my certificate to be printed and said Adios one last time.

[rayjay]

Good points Charlie. The three of us got together and decided to attend our "ceremony". If we had not gotten together it would have been a retirement ceremony where the retirees didn't show. The way I was treated my last 3 years I could have cared less. :rolleyes:

[IwantmyMMnow!]

Yes, Charlie, I am on terminal leave until my official retirement date of 1 Jan 12. And yes, I know exactly what "FIGMO" means.

I have been to many retirement ceremonies during my career and have waited with much anticipation until it was 'my turn'. At first, because of what had recently happened both personally and professionally, I didn't want to have a ceremony...just wanted to gracefully leave without any fanfare. But then I realized that I would be doing that out of spite and anger and that my ceremony was honoring the 20 1/2 years of service I have given, not just the last 7-8 months. I would be prohibiting a ceremony that is rightfully and deservedly mine to have. I would keep my children and family members from seeing the fact that I SHOULD be honored for my service to my country.

I've had a great career. I've had many accomplishments and have made many contributions and sacrifies for the AF...why should I deny myself what I deserve because I'm angry at how things have gone recently?

Each person handles their situation in their own way...it doesn't mean it's right or wrong...just different. Yes, there will be some things I will miss...a lot that I won't. I was never one to 'blow my own horn' or do things solely for the recognition. But, after 20+ years, I deserve to make a little noise and stand up to be recognized.

[rayjay]

I was never one to 'blow my own horn' or do things solely for the recognition. But, after 20+ years, I deserve to make a little noise and stand up to be recognized.

These type of people seem to be pervasive today. Look at me, see how great I am! Drove me nuts the last three years, especially with a Chief that thought it was the way to do things. Hmm, imagine that :rolleyes:

You DO deserve the ceremony and thank you very much for your service!

[bugsyc]

When leaving the military,the powers that be have a way of making you feel as though you are deserting them,The military has a unique way of leaving a bad taste in your mouth no matter how well you performed for all the years you put in..With an all volunteer military you would think that someone somewhere would see the light.But,that will probably never happen...All I can tell you is,as the years go by,the trivial slights and outright abuses start to fade.However each month when the check comes,things do start to look up a bit...Enjoy your ceremony and even more so,enjoy your retirement...40 years old and you still have the whole world ahead of you with a guaranteed income for life....Could be worse..Look foward to meeting you and the mrs.....bugsy:beer:

[IwantmyMMnow!]

When leaving the military,the powers that be have a way of making you feel as though you are deserting them,The military has a unique way of leaving a bad taste in your mouth no matter how well you performed for all the years you put in..With an all volunteer military you would think that someone somewhere would see the light.But,that will probably never happen...All I can tell you is,as the years go by,the trivial slights and outright abuses start to fade.However each month when the check comes,things do start to look up a bit...Enjoy your ceremony and even more so,enjoy your retirement...40 years old and you still have the whole world ahead of you with a guaranteed income for life....Could be worse..Look foward to meeting you and the mrs.....bugsy:beer:

Thanks, bugsy...that helps put things in perspective some. As for meeting the mrs, she won't be there...and I wouldn't want to subject you to meeting the cold-hearted b*** she has become. Got a letter Saturday from the Child Support Agency from the county she's living in, formally requesting I provide support for my children. So, the $6K+ I've sent her since March isn't support? God, I wish she didn't have my kids...

Anyway, the ceremony is still on for Saturday at 3pm. I'll be on the road for the rest of this week starting Wednesday; if anyone needs to contact me, my cell is 843-364-1548.

[rayjay]

As for meeting the mrs, she won't be there...and I wouldn't want to subject you to meeting the cold-hearted b*** she has become. Got a letter Saturday from the Child Support Agency from the county she's living in, formally requesting I provide support for my children. So, the $6K+ I've sent her since March isn't support? God, I wish she didn't have my kids...


Oh boy, been there, done that. Be happy you are not in NYS... It only gets better once the kids are grown up and finished with college. Have not seen or spoken to Ex #2 since 2009 when my mother passed away.

[bugsyc]

Thanks, bugsy...that helps put things in perspective some. As for meeting the mrs, she won't be there...and I wouldn't want to subject you to meeting the cold-hearted b*** she has become. Got a letter Saturday from the Child Support Agency from the county she's living in, formally requesting I provide support for my children. So, the $6K+ I've sent her since March isn't support? God, I wish she didn't have my kids...

Anyway, the ceremony is still on for Saturday at 3pm. I'll be on the road for the rest of this week starting Wednesday; if anyone needs to contact me, my cell is 843-364-1548.
RULE NUMBER 1DON"T SWEAT THE SMALL STUFFRULE NUMBER2 it's all SMALL STUFF I know of where I speak.Presently on wife no.3. 4kids,1 grand child...life's rough but,nothing for a real trooper.Keep on keepin on......bugsy

[IwantmyMMnow!]

yeah, I know. It just burns my a$$ because she knows first-hand that I'm upside-down on the house, have a mountain of cc debt, and will be seeing a 50% cut in income shortly. My decision to move back to Asheville shouldn't be a surprise to her, either. I mentioned on more than one occasion that I would like to move back there after I retire.

Meanwhile, after she hightails it out of here, she sits on her a$$ and doesn't get a job until recently. She's living with her folks, so her living expenses are minimal, she has a vehicle that is legally mine, I continued paying for insurance on said vehicle until June, I continued paying for her cell phone until last month (I turned off her phone at her request), and she pulls this crap. Every time I see my kids, they want me to buy them stuff because "mom says you have all the money". And whenever I bring these facts up, I'm the a-hole.

If I was a true a-hole and didn't give a crap about my kids, I would demand she return the vehicle and immediately file for bankruptcy; her name is also on the deed to the house as well as most of the credit cards, so the banks would come after her for the money owed to them....but I won't do that for the sake of my children....

[rayjay]

Oh man, does your ex know my ex #2? Very similiar except the living with the parents. How old are your kids? Mine were 9 and 5 when we split. Like I said, be happy your are not in New York. Mandated child support levels here that leave you very little to live on. The only good thing was they changd how often a ex could ask for an increase. I was very lucky and had a sympathic judge who saw my ex for the screwball she is. 24 years later she still thinks I owe her a free ride. :rolleyes:

[IwantmyMMnow!]

Well, I have 3....they were 14, 8, and 5 when we split...all have had a b-day since then. The oldest is my stepson; I never adopted him...just didn't think it was 'necessary' to do so. He was a product of a one-night stand (years before I met the ex, obviously) and she kept his biological father out of the picture. Since we've split, he has come along on one visit...the first one. So, I haven't seen him since late Jan. I've told her many times that I would like for him to come along.

After a couple of months, I told her that I don't feel right about just seeing the other two without him and that I wanted to at least talk to him via email. She said she finally told him about his real father and that I should give him room to sort things out....6 months later I still haven't seen him or even talked to him and when I ask about talking or seeing him, she just doesn't say anything except she feels it would be uncomfortable for him or he isn't interested. After hearing this for the 3rd or 4th time, I told her I don't believe her and that she is full of sh**. The money I've been sending is for all 3 kids, not just the 2 I'm 'legally' responsible for.

My uneducated opinion is that she thinks no man can be the 'father' she thinks he deserves.

Funny thing is, I called the Child Support Agency yesterday, got voicemail, left a message with my name and number, and haven't received a call back yet.

Bottom line in all of this is we both have 'issues'. I've been getting help for a year and a half now (I've been diagnosed with dysthymia...a low-grade form of chronic depression/anxiety). At the end of last year, she told me that I haven't changed even though I've been getting help. I think it's unreasonable to expect someone to change in 6 months who they are and how they act after being that way for almost 40 years. It's not as simple as losing weight, you know. Ironic thing is, many people at work noticed a change; my First Sergeant even told me one day, "Kyle, I don't know what you're doing, but keep it up. Lately when I see you, you always have a smile on your face." I've never had anyone say that to me...EVER!

I didn't know wedding vows were selective; fidelity is #1 with her (which I am not guilty of breaking, amidst countless accusations), but 'in sickness and in health til death do us part' doesn't mean a damn thing, apparently.

[rayjay]

I feel for ya Kyle. Like I said been there, done that. I did everything but bend over backwards and touch the back of head to floor trying to please my ex and keep the marriage together. I finally gave up after 2+ years of trying, even after we had split. It will get better for you, but TIME is a four letter word.
My ex actually did me a favor, 18 months after we split I started dating the love of my life. We've been together now almost 23 years, married for 18 and have a beautiful 14 year old daughter. Torqued off the ex big time as my wife is considerably younger than me and was hot as hell. :D

The kids are the real losers in things like this. Do everything you can to be there for them. Its important and will pay off when they are older. I would keep trying with your step son, let him know you care.

[bugsyc]

My sincerest apologies for not attending.The kid is sick and the wifey is coming down with it...I wish I could have been there to show my support.I hope that all went well.Now you can put that all behind you.I wish you only the best of luck from now on....no more 5am wake ups...check is in the mail...Sincerely yours bugsy....:coolman:

[IwantmyMMnow!]

My sincerest apologies for not attending.The kid is sick and the wifey is coming down with it...I wish I could have been there to show my support.I hope that all went well.Now you can put that all behind you.I wish you only the best of luck from now on....no more 5am wake ups...check is in the mail...Sincerely yours bugsy....:coolman:

Don't sweat it. My daughter woke me up at 2:30am the day of and puked all over the place. The ceremony was very nice and I managed to 'let go' of my disgust I've been keeping on low boil for the last six months. I realized right before I began my speech that it wasn't important to air things out, that the ceremony itself was providing the 'closure' I'd been searching for. My family and my children were there, which was most important.

Yes, I'm still angered about what has happened, but it doesn't seem all that important now. I'm ready to move on...

[bugsyc]

Congrats Mr. civilian.Be proud of all the years you served your country with honor and leave the rest behind.Sorry I wasn't there.Life came up...I'm sure we'll get together,we live too close to each other not to....bugsy

[HammerDown]

Congratulations, Kyle--sounds like the ceremony went well. And THANK YOU for your service to our country!!!

Glad to have met you at MV IX, and hope to see you at #10!!!


Connie and Jack (Fordfrk)

[SC Cheesehead]

Hey, congrats, Kyle.

Wish I could have been there, bubba. We need to get together after I get back to the States and have our own little retirement celebration for you. :beer:

[IwantmyMMnow!]

Congrats Mr. civilian.Be proud of all the years you served your country with honor and leave the rest behind.Sorry I wasn't there.Life came up...I'm sure we'll get together,we live too close to each other not to....bugsy

You've got 3 weeks :lol: ...I'm outta here no later than Jan 5th.


Congratulations, Kyle--sounds like the ceremony went well. And THANK YOU for your service to our country!!!

Glad to have met you at MV IX, and hope to see you at #10!!!


Connie and Jack (Fordfrk)

Your welcome Connie. I plan on going to MVX...I think I might be sick then and will have to miss school/work for a few days....;)


Hey, congrats, Kyle.

Wish I could have been there, bubba. We need to get together after I get back to the States and have our own little retirement celebration for you. :beer:

You got my phone #...just give me a holla! Dickie's and/or a Packer game is good enough for me. I'll be at my local Packer bar tomorrow, getting hammered and watching the Pack go 15-0! Welcome back to the US and glad you are safe and sound!!!!!!!!!!